Are just unnecessary baggage to carry with us everywhere and everytime. What are we afraid of and what are we worrying over?
We know the do's and donts of good living, but we have difficulty implementing it for our own classified reasons. We have complaints and excuses that stem from our worries. A flip side is that, complaints, excuses and procrastination lead to fear and worry also. If you do what you gotta do at the right time, what's there to worry or be afraid of?
Worry and fear - lifetime guarantors of "good life erosion", it will eat into you and everything close to you and all will be lost.
Have faith in yourself, have conviction in what you do and do it well. Believe that you are neither superior nor inferior to another man and that you have been blessed with all your emotions, intellect and heath in all the required proportions suitable for you, in order to serve a purpose on this earth. Now, don't start scratching your head and ask yourself "What's the purpose of my life?" - living well is a good purpose you know !
Discover who you are, what you can do, take up lifelong learning and be humble about everything. Refrain from gossip, bad habits and bad company and get rid of your ego. Live respectably and show respect. Accept that some things are out of your control.
Pray for your families, your children, that they may become owners of good and healthy minds which will work towards all that is good and prosper.
Goodbye fear and get lost worry.
Monday, November 12, 2012
I, Me !
Are first and second person pronouns – two words that make up a good portion of our daily conversation.
Children today are significantly more aware about themselves, their tastes and have strong opinions too. It’s not uncommon to find a toddler who argues with his parents, speaks emphatically like an adult ….something on the lines of
‘I don’t have to do anything if I don’t want to do it !!’
I can speak safely for my generation as being taught to have mindsets to share, to include and to be concerned about others and their wellbeing. We were taught to adjust, to compromise, to forgive, to let go, all with the intention of maintaining peace for all.
‘I don’t care’, ‘Doesn’t work for me’, ‘I don’t have to put up with it’ ….so many ‘I’ s in our vocabulary. What is this obsession we have for ‘I’?
We are so lost within ourselves, we don’t seek out for anything beyond ‘our own person’ (coz it’s not worth it?), we don’t enquire about another (coz we may be intruding?), we don’t get together in the name of fellowship (coz it’s just a waste of time and money?), we are too engrossed with our day-to-day, monthly and annual plans and targets, we forget we need each other and fail to recognize one’s worth, we forget to say thank you to them (coz we think they owe it to us?)
If we can replace ‘I’ and ‘me’ with ‘us’, there is inclusion of ‘everyone’ which is perhaps more meaningful and sustainable. We must acknowledge others and what they do for us with at least a simple thank you. We must help and protect one another (not just because it is part of social responsibility), but it is essential to living long and living well. We must lend a helping hand to our less fortunate brothers and sisters (because it is the right thing to do). We must be more humane (not just by textbook standards), but because we owe it to each other.
Heal the World. Make it a better place for you and for me and the entire human race - MJ
Children today are significantly more aware about themselves, their tastes and have strong opinions too. It’s not uncommon to find a toddler who argues with his parents, speaks emphatically like an adult ….something on the lines of
‘I don’t have to do anything if I don’t want to do it !!’
I can speak safely for my generation as being taught to have mindsets to share, to include and to be concerned about others and their wellbeing. We were taught to adjust, to compromise, to forgive, to let go, all with the intention of maintaining peace for all.
‘I don’t care’, ‘Doesn’t work for me’, ‘I don’t have to put up with it’ ….so many ‘I’ s in our vocabulary. What is this obsession we have for ‘I’?
We are so lost within ourselves, we don’t seek out for anything beyond ‘our own person’ (coz it’s not worth it?), we don’t enquire about another (coz we may be intruding?), we don’t get together in the name of fellowship (coz it’s just a waste of time and money?), we are too engrossed with our day-to-day, monthly and annual plans and targets, we forget we need each other and fail to recognize one’s worth, we forget to say thank you to them (coz we think they owe it to us?)
If we can replace ‘I’ and ‘me’ with ‘us’, there is inclusion of ‘everyone’ which is perhaps more meaningful and sustainable. We must acknowledge others and what they do for us with at least a simple thank you. We must help and protect one another (not just because it is part of social responsibility), but it is essential to living long and living well. We must lend a helping hand to our less fortunate brothers and sisters (because it is the right thing to do). We must be more humane (not just by textbook standards), but because we owe it to each other.
Heal the World. Make it a better place for you and for me and the entire human race - MJ
Thursday, November 8, 2012
"There's just no time" .....are you serious?
Everywhere you go, everyone you talk to...just everything about everything is just so busy...or is it just all just a thin veil hiding nothing?
The buzz phrase at work, at home, just about any place, even the beach....."God, it's just SO busy, I can barely keep up with the voicemails, the emails, the kids' homework, the husband's schedule, my work, the house......" ; it just goes on from there.
Just before you can manage two words out, you get "Oh, I don't know, there's just too much going on". Even the homeless guy on the street quips "Just go away, I've got too much on my mind....just leave the money here"
I tried to make an inquiry about a charity donation event to a fellow church goer. All I asked "Do you know where I can find some information about.....? to which I get "there are just too many of these programs and events, so hard to keep up ....I don't know (with the "it's the least of my worries" look on the face)......and hey you didn't hear me say that !!! '
Really???? Are we all just so busy or trying hard to stay in the race?
Even God took a day off when He was busy creating the world - the day of the Sabbath.
It's important to take time off to just reflect on what's really important - the what and the who. There is a good portion of chapter 3 in the Book of Ecclesiastes dedicated to "A Time for Everything". It's a passage loaded with plenty of truth - the key aspect being that whatever time should be allocated to whatever activity, is ultimately decided by God.
If you have inner conflicts about how to spend your time, on what or with who.... just take a read.....and trust me ....you'll feel better.
End of the day, there is no such thing as "no time", you make the time for what's important. There is no easy answer to this time shortage - we just need to pick and choose how we use our time a little more wisely, without throwing away what's truly valuable.....but again.....we come back to same problem....how to make that wise choice??
This time problem is indeed a vicious circle !!
The buzz phrase at work, at home, just about any place, even the beach....."God, it's just SO busy, I can barely keep up with the voicemails, the emails, the kids' homework, the husband's schedule, my work, the house......" ; it just goes on from there.
Just before you can manage two words out, you get "Oh, I don't know, there's just too much going on". Even the homeless guy on the street quips "Just go away, I've got too much on my mind....just leave the money here"
I tried to make an inquiry about a charity donation event to a fellow church goer. All I asked "Do you know where I can find some information about.....? to which I get "there are just too many of these programs and events, so hard to keep up ....I don't know (with the "it's the least of my worries" look on the face)......and hey you didn't hear me say that !!! '
Really???? Are we all just so busy or trying hard to stay in the race?
Even God took a day off when He was busy creating the world - the day of the Sabbath.
It's important to take time off to just reflect on what's really important - the what and the who. There is a good portion of chapter 3 in the Book of Ecclesiastes dedicated to "A Time for Everything". It's a passage loaded with plenty of truth - the key aspect being that whatever time should be allocated to whatever activity, is ultimately decided by God.
If you have inner conflicts about how to spend your time, on what or with who.... just take a read.....and trust me ....you'll feel better.
End of the day, there is no such thing as "no time", you make the time for what's important. There is no easy answer to this time shortage - we just need to pick and choose how we use our time a little more wisely, without throwing away what's truly valuable.....but again.....we come back to same problem....how to make that wise choice??
This time problem is indeed a vicious circle !!
Monday, October 22, 2012
Citizen of the world
We have witnessed how in the past century our globe has contracted, with respect to our ability to reach, thanks to advances in telecommunication and transportation (electric technology). We are all inhabitants of the one and the same global village. The speed of information search, synthesis and transfer has made it amazingly easy to virtually transport oneself to different countries, cultures and languages in an instant. We have come to an age where no information seems impossible to obtain.
Yeah, about the above paragraph, that was sort of the background for the theme I had in mind. But let me tell you what I really want you to know.
T and I have had the good fortune of being placed in different countries, during our growing and late years. Little did we know how that would impact us. Our journey thus far, has been very humbling to say the least. More than anything else, our intellectual understanding of "our differences" (referred to on a global scale) have been superseded by many undeniable truths that now abide within our hearts.
And they are....... we, people, are all one and the same, with the same needs and necessities, the same fears and frustrations, the same desires and delusions, the same pains and pleasures....end of the day we are all just human, with the same fallibilities. We are not superior or inferior to the other. We just have different appearances, speak different languages, hold on to different ways of life. Our invaders of yore, brought the division and distinction that has stuck for centuries in our mental construct. Let them have their credit for the sake of preserving history.
Point of the matter - if we are able to shed those conceptions of race, color, language, just for a moment, there is that unadultered and inexplicable liberation we experience, when we are embrace our differences .......and the feeling of empowerment that unity brings !......so hard to explain in words.....
But once that happens, it is indeed difficult to contain ourselves to our specific countries for suddenly our boundaries have become blurry......
We know in our hearts we are all one and stand united....in love, peace, harmony and brotherhood......
and at that precise moment, we've all become citizens of the same world !
Yeah, about the above paragraph, that was sort of the background for the theme I had in mind. But let me tell you what I really want you to know.
T and I have had the good fortune of being placed in different countries, during our growing and late years. Little did we know how that would impact us. Our journey thus far, has been very humbling to say the least. More than anything else, our intellectual understanding of "our differences" (referred to on a global scale) have been superseded by many undeniable truths that now abide within our hearts.
And they are....... we, people, are all one and the same, with the same needs and necessities, the same fears and frustrations, the same desires and delusions, the same pains and pleasures....end of the day we are all just human, with the same fallibilities. We are not superior or inferior to the other. We just have different appearances, speak different languages, hold on to different ways of life. Our invaders of yore, brought the division and distinction that has stuck for centuries in our mental construct. Let them have their credit for the sake of preserving history.
Point of the matter - if we are able to shed those conceptions of race, color, language, just for a moment, there is that unadultered and inexplicable liberation we experience, when we are embrace our differences .......and the feeling of empowerment that unity brings !......so hard to explain in words.....
But once that happens, it is indeed difficult to contain ourselves to our specific countries for suddenly our boundaries have become blurry......
We know in our hearts we are all one and stand united....in love, peace, harmony and brotherhood......
and at that precise moment, we've all become citizens of the same world !
Backup plans and backup pals !
In this age, almost all of us find ourselves running a rat race. The age factor is not relevant anymore. Young children and youth are prodded to become competitive in their spirit, young couples are scrambling to put their lives together and the aged are preparing their nest for retirement. We know that we are fallible and that our plans are not perfect, so we find alternatives - if not this, then that or maybe that other one? Back up plans have become a staple in our regular way of thinking and operating. Sure we can all live with that.
But how about when you realize some people warm upto you (these ones would normally look through you like you were never there !!) and you wonder if they have started to like you after all?
It takes a couple of incidents until you become sure of what is really going on. These people need an audience, need to find a way to kill boredom, a way to cope with loneliness, a way to restore their confidence. So they go in search of lesser mortals, when their regulars are not available. And some of us end up playing those roles.
Yes some of us have been assigned to the group "backup pals", in what I imagine to be a growing list !
Yes some of us have been assigned to the group "backup pals", in what I imagine to be a growing list !
There is consolation somewhere that we have been able to fill their void somehow and is sort of gratifying to know that our existence is not meaningless after all.
So yeah, we can live with that too....can't we?
Monday, January 31, 2011
Events and Circumstances
So I have been pondering quietly, searching within myself what I am truly seeking for in this lifetime of mine. I have not reached an answer, but I have met with a few findings – some of my own make and some of others.
Crossing 30 was not easy. I have endlessly tortured myself with comparison charts, goals and objectives lists unaccomplished and many more. We all try to get our lives in order and so we start to plan. For some, these plans act like guidelines but for others, they become benchmarks - must meet it.
It is surprising how such a simple task of planning can take a life of its own, with a streak of hell in it. I have been one of those persons who have planned and planned but forgotten to live and enjoy myself. I have unnecessarily immersed myself in self-torture, pity and misery all of my own make, all because I have not been able to achieve "ALL" that I had planned to.
One word that encompasses all that rubbish is "stupidity".
Well, for those reading this blog, you will agree with me if I said that this cruel world has defined parameters of success rather harshly, which includes the following:
- A masters degree (preferably medicine)
- A job that pays 6 figures
- Annual vacations abroad
- Happy marriage to someone rich and handsome (rich is better and better still with good financial inheritance)
- Kids
- A big home, 2 cars and a helper at home
- Associations with friends and acquaintances who are successful
As shallow as they may seem, these are your minimum requirements to obtain a clean bill of success. No amount of education or realization can seem to cure our hunger to meet those requirements. I have been on this bandwagon of wannabes. It is shameful but it is the glaring truth for many.
I have been so hard on myself these last several months analyzing and post analyzing every step of my life, every decision I have made and others have made for me. Are the standards I am trying to reach too high? Whose standards do I want to meet? Why am I not happy?
My father of 65 years convinced me that there is no need to be troubled. For someone who has conducted umpteen cycles of introspective analysis, his conclusions are good enough to be believed. He said “Every decision one makes depends on one’s circumstance and the available information and opportunities relevant to that time. They clearly are the best ones of that time. But one never knows if one will turn out to be successful or not until at the very end. They are like post-mortem conclusions where a doctor says that the patient may not have died had he done things in a different way. The patient did his best with what he had and what he knew and what was relevant to his time - but who cares? After all, it's so easy to pass judgements when all is over, right?”
He also added “It does not end just with these decisions. There are events which better these decisions or make you regret them for the rest of your life. Some opportunities come by which you take your chances on – these opportunities are your life changing or life breaking events. In conclusion, one never really knows the outcome of one’s life. So there is no point in fretting – just live your life one day at a time, enjoy it like you might not have a tomorrow.”
I think I learnt a life lesson here. It is to attribute one's decisions to those events and circumstances that have shaped the course of one's life. What about you??
Crossing 30 was not easy. I have endlessly tortured myself with comparison charts, goals and objectives lists unaccomplished and many more. We all try to get our lives in order and so we start to plan. For some, these plans act like guidelines but for others, they become benchmarks - must meet it.
It is surprising how such a simple task of planning can take a life of its own, with a streak of hell in it. I have been one of those persons who have planned and planned but forgotten to live and enjoy myself. I have unnecessarily immersed myself in self-torture, pity and misery all of my own make, all because I have not been able to achieve "ALL" that I had planned to.
One word that encompasses all that rubbish is "stupidity".
Well, for those reading this blog, you will agree with me if I said that this cruel world has defined parameters of success rather harshly, which includes the following:
- A masters degree (preferably medicine)
- A job that pays 6 figures
- Annual vacations abroad
- Happy marriage to someone rich and handsome (rich is better and better still with good financial inheritance)
- Kids
- A big home, 2 cars and a helper at home
- Associations with friends and acquaintances who are successful
As shallow as they may seem, these are your minimum requirements to obtain a clean bill of success. No amount of education or realization can seem to cure our hunger to meet those requirements. I have been on this bandwagon of wannabes. It is shameful but it is the glaring truth for many.
I have been so hard on myself these last several months analyzing and post analyzing every step of my life, every decision I have made and others have made for me. Are the standards I am trying to reach too high? Whose standards do I want to meet? Why am I not happy?
My father of 65 years convinced me that there is no need to be troubled. For someone who has conducted umpteen cycles of introspective analysis, his conclusions are good enough to be believed. He said “Every decision one makes depends on one’s circumstance and the available information and opportunities relevant to that time. They clearly are the best ones of that time. But one never knows if one will turn out to be successful or not until at the very end. They are like post-mortem conclusions where a doctor says that the patient may not have died had he done things in a different way. The patient did his best with what he had and what he knew and what was relevant to his time - but who cares? After all, it's so easy to pass judgements when all is over, right?”
He also added “It does not end just with these decisions. There are events which better these decisions or make you regret them for the rest of your life. Some opportunities come by which you take your chances on – these opportunities are your life changing or life breaking events. In conclusion, one never really knows the outcome of one’s life. So there is no point in fretting – just live your life one day at a time, enjoy it like you might not have a tomorrow.”
I think I learnt a life lesson here. It is to attribute one's decisions to those events and circumstances that have shaped the course of one's life. What about you??
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Moment(s) of Gratitude
Ever had a moment, when you get completely overwhelmed by all the truths - good and bad? when you are weakened by the facts you love and embrace?
You take that 'moment' to analyse and realize that you have been one heck of a lucky person - born in a great home to good parents, blessed with a windfall of opportunities, memorable moments speckled with tons of humor, that too with friends or family, umpteen chances to get to know and understand different types of people, and some whom we later hold close to our hearts and others who we let pass. It's just plain awesome when you think about it for a 'moment'.
And in that 'moment' of realization, you are overcome by a sort of power.... of gratitude. And when it hits hard like the storm, all the walls around your emotions come crashing down - you now declare earnestly with an outpouring of tears and a quiet (and long) prayer, with THANKS.
You are so alive at that 'moment' and your senses are awake - am not sure if you could have an adrenaline rush, but am yet to discover. That 'moment' (so precious) helps you to see clearly your strengths and weaknesses and also erase all that is bad....'for a moment'. So powerful.
These 'moments' are not a one time occurence. It happens at the right time - 'defining moments'. And the next time it happens, it helps you redefine. And so it is self evolves with our changing lives.
Morale of this blog :-
take the time to recognize those moments and be grateful for it.
You take that 'moment' to analyse and realize that you have been one heck of a lucky person - born in a great home to good parents, blessed with a windfall of opportunities, memorable moments speckled with tons of humor, that too with friends or family, umpteen chances to get to know and understand different types of people, and some whom we later hold close to our hearts and others who we let pass. It's just plain awesome when you think about it for a 'moment'.
And in that 'moment' of realization, you are overcome by a sort of power.... of gratitude. And when it hits hard like the storm, all the walls around your emotions come crashing down - you now declare earnestly with an outpouring of tears and a quiet (and long) prayer, with THANKS.
You are so alive at that 'moment' and your senses are awake - am not sure if you could have an adrenaline rush, but am yet to discover. That 'moment' (so precious) helps you to see clearly your strengths and weaknesses and also erase all that is bad....'for a moment'. So powerful.
These 'moments' are not a one time occurence. It happens at the right time - 'defining moments'. And the next time it happens, it helps you redefine. And so it is self evolves with our changing lives.
Morale of this blog :-
take the time to recognize those moments and be grateful for it.
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